Tuesday 5 May 2015

the importance of body positivity | ruth carmel kirby

Hi<3



We've all had moments of insecurity. When we catch ourselves looking in the mirror and notice a part of ourself isn't looking it's "best", or the classic "does my bum look big in this dress?"
It happens to everyone. With me, it just so happens to be my weight.

I'm lumpy and bumpy. I curve in "all the wrong places" (thanks Megan Trainor). My boobs are pitiful and my legs wobble badly when I run. Recently, I went to take a shower when I was in a particularly stressed mood. Stress breaks me out too, so I look greasy and obviously, as it does before anyone gets in the shower, my hair was messy and wild looking.
Looking in the mirror made me feel physically sick. I was disgusted by myself, mainly by my weight. I'm usually a very positive, happy person so this was a big thing for me. I wasted at least half an hour crying because of this.
It's had a big impact on the way I view my life. I woke up the next morning, with a sort of "did that actually happen oh my god".
I wasted a good half hour feeling sad about something. A half hour I could have spent writing, singing, dancing, running, listening to music, on the phone to a friend, doing revision.
And I spent it crying over something that has been imprinted into my brain by my peers, the media and in some cases, my subconscious. The little voice in the back of my head whispering "you know you're not good enough for this don't you?" "that dress makes you look fat". "i bet everyones staring at your bum wobbling right now".



Don't make the same mistake I did. Next time you're looking in the mirror, and whispering horrible remarks about your body, or really any part of you, or even just thinking them, tell yourself to stop. Move away from the mirror, or stare in the mirror at parts of you that you love. Stare at the beautiful ways your eyes fade into different shades of the same colour, or the sculpted nature of your face. Stare until you remember that you are beautiful, and that somebody loves you. Somebody does. Even if it isn't anyone in your life right now, then it's me<3
Similarly, don't let the media/your peers/your teachers/all of the above preasure you into losing or gaining weight. Anorexia, obesity, bullimia and various other disorders of that kind will be the ruin of your life and the ruin of your happiness, but sadly many of these are encouraged by certain groups. There's a lot of easier said that done surrounding this topic, but unfortunately, you just have to ignore it. People can be beautiful without you having to feel preasured because you look different. Everyone has a different story, and as long as you are healthy, happy and preferably not hungry, then you're doing okay :)



I'd like to reiterate though, calling yourself names is a form of self harm. It's not very well recognised, but it harms the mental image you have of yourself. If someone you know, or even yourself is doing this, please attempt to stop it. If it's someone else, maybe a gentle chat is in order, and if it's you, a pamper night or doing something to make you feel beautiful may be in order.

Below, I'm going to leave a list of ten things that make me feel beautiful, so you can attempt some of them :)

So, to sum up this post, love yourself, love your body, and don't let you or others be mean to you<3

1~ Painting my nails a bright colour. it immediately brightens my mood up too!
2~ Putting on a fun, peeling off mask. It's the funniest thing when half of it is hanging off your face, and the feeling of your skin afterwards makes it all better!
3~ Disney films. Mulan, Tangled, Beauty and the Beast, Enchanted, The Lion King, Alladin, Disney literally never fails to put me in a good mood!
4~ Motivational music! At the moment, I'm loving New Perspective by P!atd, We Shalt Not Overcome by Frank Turner, Awake My Soul by Mumford and Sons and anything by Nicki Minaj!
5~ Baking. Chocolate chip cupcakes are enough to put anyone in a better mood, and make them feel beautiful!
6~ A night out! Sometimes you're just bored of being cooped up in the house, and you need to get out before you go stir crazy!
7~ Belting out Ellie Goulding is fun, try singing a song that compliments your voice. If you hate the sound of your singing, mouth along to it, whatever suits you!
8~ Read a cute book! My personal favourites are Stargirl by Jerry Spinelli, Cannibals by Cynthia D. Grant and Kelp by Linda Aronson!
9~ Posting a selfie. The comments on it are uplifting, and make me feel beautiful, even if it's not a photo I took that day!
10~ a lush bath, or a bubble bath, or even a lush bubble bath can be the most relaxing, amazing experience and it makes me sad to know that some people don't live near enough to lush to have that experience regularly!


Thank you for reading!

Ruth Carmel Kirby x

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